Over-thinking will be the death of me, if I let it.
We all do it, get quiet, and let our minds wander. But sometimes our minds wander to places we wish it wouldn’t. Our minds remind us of things we thought had been forgotten, mistakes we thought had been buried. Our minds, in those deep, dark places, hold all those secrets that we never let see the light of day. When you get into those moments, those quiet, still moments where we let our minds wander, it’s often very difficult to get ourselves out. Once you’re in, it’s like you’re reliving that moment, rehashing that mistake, over and over. Soon, that memory consumes you to the point where you completely forget it’s a memory and start to feel emotions as if the moment was present again. You forget that this mistake is in the past and begin to feel just as guilty, regretful, and ashamed as the day you made it. Thinking about the past can suck you in, if you let it.
See no matter what the outcome of that mistake was, there is absolutely nothing you can do about it now. What’s done is done. People think that to make yourself feel guilty about it is to make amends for what you did. The truth is making yourself remember to the point of tears just makes you miserable when the person, or people, you think you’ve affected has probably moved on. Think about it. While you lay there soaking your pillowcase, your so-called victim is probably sound asleep, not constantly replaying how much you hurt them or how much they hate you. I mean, really? Do you really think that what you did was so terrible that they take time out of their day to think about you? Doubtful. If anything they’re probably trying their hardest not to think about you at all. So why are you thinking about them? Thinking about your past mistakes doesn’t erase them and not thinking about your past mistakes doesn’t make you a terrible person. Consistently replaying the past does nothing but keep you in the past. Focus on the present and the future, things that you can have a positive impact on if you choose to. Remind yourself of the past only to remind yourself of how to have a better present. Learn from your mistakes, own them, and move on. Otherwise, you’ll be trapped in the black hole that is regret...and ain’t nobody got time for that.
